So many of my friends have been made through Fowler. So all ya all, How many of you still miss camp even though its been a good amount of time since we left. I hope most of you are saying yeah I am missing camp. In fact I miss it a lot. Because otherwise I am alone in that... and that is no good. I wonder sometimes why I miss it so damn much. I mean its not like my life at Cornell is anything horrible. I have a lot of friends, and I have a good time and I am busy. So why do I want to be at camp? So here is the answer that I came up with: Camp protects you. If you disagree with me then read on... because the logic follows.
There is a community at Fowler that is like no other community I have been involved with or have witnessed. The people there are motivated to make everyone feel welcome. I remember the first day 2010. I was with the one person I knew most the majority of staff training. Until I realized I may have to sit next to somebody else. and let me tell you my heart was racing the first day during staff training when I had to sit next to Austin. I was scared shitless, but the day that scared me more was the first day I talked to Jenna. Holy Hell I thought my heart was gonna jump out of my chest. You wanna know something; within a week of working for them they had proven to me that they weren't that scary. Along with the rest of the staff. I made friends in record time at Fowler. and then had them supporting me the entire time. You see camp is a weird place. you can be who you are and they will accept you no questions asked. I'm weird and anxious and very direct with what I say and it freaks a lot of people out. At fowler people embraced it and thought i was a lovable human being. They do it with everyone. You will be hard pressed to find someone who feels like they don't belong. You never feel alone. or insecure. or like you need to be someone else. That's it. you don't need to be anyone else. That is what I love. And people love you. for the person that you are. and you always have more than one person supporting you and never have to be alone. Never. its amazing. no matter how hard your job is, how stressed out you are. Someone will find you when you are crying and give you a hug. That is why we all miss Fowler. Because you are never alone. Although at our designated schools or jobs or homes we may have a wonderful group of friends or family and we may be busy but it doesn't cancel out those times when you need to be able to be exactly who you are and not be alone. Because lets face it with most people everyone feels as if a facade is necessary. You need to act smarter or be prettier and not appear in public until you have your make up and cute clothes on. Everyone is guilty of it. I know I am. Props to those who are not. Camp lets go of those facades. When you are there you don't have to be smarter than the next person. You don't have to compete, you work hard and you be you. That is your job there. And because of the lack of pressure to be someone you aren't it makes you feel like you are loved and never alone and it lets people focus on their job and do the best they can.
That is why we all want to go back. Because lets face it in the real world we are all competing acting like we are better than the next person. we are expected to wear make up to be pretty and to wear heels to show off our legs or make a certain amount of money. We all want a place to be us and no one more or less for that matter. We all want to be able to go hug someone when we are sad and insecure and be real about the reason we are sad and insecure. This type of place doesn't come around very often. Its a Christian camp where all the staff are supposed to take care of more than a hundred kids every week but we also take care of each other in a way so unique to the world today. That is why we all want to go back. we wont find another place like it. That is why we all want to go back there and keep it with us always. There is however a way to make it a part of who you are without making it something you want to run back to. Try this. When you feel insecure don't say I want to go back to fowler... instead say I am insecure right now but I have no reason to be because the person that I am is loved by so many. and although they are not around me now. They still love me. That is what you tell yourself. People don't stop loving you just because they are no longer visible or a regular in your life. Those people still love you when you are in the real world. So although you are not at camp your still just as loved. and just as not alone. We may be spread apart but we are all still there for each other. So when you feel alone don't. Because your not. :) I got mooshy. That's my job, because I am Hannah.
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